What was I thinking

8 posts in 20 days. That is what I call hopeless stats. Epic fail!

This is how it all started. I woke up one day to realise that I had had no “me” space in a long long time. I had completely lost touch with so many things that I enjoyed doing. Like this blog for instance, was lying in a corner with absolutely no attention from me. I hadn’t clicked a picture in a very long time. I even had no clue when the subscription on my Flickr pro account ran out. I logged in one day and found out it had expired. It made me very sad. I wanted to do something about it. This putting up a post a day was an effort to reclaim something of what I felt I had lost. The few posts that I put up made me feel nice. Just when I was beginning to feel like I could finally write something again and make some sense of it, I lost the flow.

I tried to do too much at the same time. I was trying to regain my virtual life when my physical life it self was non-existant. Last couple of weeks have been very demanding both physically and emotionally. I have woken up almost everyday wishing I could go back to sleep for another few hours when I know I have to drag my feet and get going. Weekends haven’t exactly been very rejuvanating either. I have been staring at my computer screen so much that I even stopped lurking on Twitter over weekends. With what little enthusiasm I have left during weeknights and weekends, I have hung out with the husband and some friends and tried cooking something tad more interesting than my unexciting everyday cooking.

I now I have new found respect for working mothers. My mother used to wake up every morning, pack 4 dabbas, send 2 kids to school, pack off a husband to work and then leave to work. She always had the energy and time for everything we wanted. In fact, she even had time to do her own thing! One big difference is the fact that my mom had a job that was strictly 9 to 5 (at least when we were growing up). No one’s job is strictly 9 to 5 anymore. Even my mom’s job stopped being that when she decided to go for those promotions she missed out on when we were growing up. There are days when I feel like none of this worth it. Today is just one of them.

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