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Kid alert!

I’ve always been a little uncomfortable around kids. I have a problem with really small kids ‘cos they cry round the clock. I’m saying this in the sweetest, most nonjudgmental way possible. They’re not exactly my kinda fun especially when I’m travelling or trying to get something done. But they always find me in malls, theaters and trains. I’ve given up reacting these days when I find a crying toddler in the same coupe. Its sort of a given, you know. This time it was complete package with a family, crying baby, pram and all. Femina/Stardust to the rescue and I survived.

Being around slightly more grown up kids, say, 10-12 year olds, is a different kind of discomfort. Though I like them better than the crying toddlers, I’m always worried about what I’m saying or doing when I’m around them. I’m a pretty careless person and I don’t want to be the one that the kids’ parents warn them about.

I normally don’t swear or use bad language in conversation, except when I’m driving. You know what I’m talking about, Madras roads, careless cyclists, idiotic auto drivers. Its almost impossible to keep my cool and reach the destination without screaming at at least one person on the way. When I get irritated on the road, I kinda lose control on what I’m saying. The curses just flow, multiligually. This has got me into some very seat squirming trouble. I even got out of it unscathed with my parents. But twice, it happened in front of kids.

My friend’s brother, a very well-informed kid, turned around and said “G, do you not realise that there are 2 twelve year olds (him and his friend, to make matters worse) in the car,” in the tone that your 50 year old warden probably uses to make you feel like a piece of lump. I honestly had no comeback and wanted the earth to swallow me up right then. Just when I thought those scars were healing, today, I said something that I really shouldn’t have in the car, in front of my 12 year old cousin. There was uncomfortable silence for a minute or so and then he said “Appa used that word when he was fighting with the watchman the other day.”

I give up! I shouldn’t be allowed to interact with human being less than 15 years of age. I really don’t want to be the one to leave any scars on their already difficult adolescence.

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15 thoughts on “Kid alert!

  1. Heh heh, do I spot a spot of condescension towards today’s 12 year olds? I find it extremely hard to believe mere cuss words would scar them. Now explicit threats of violence, now that’s something different.

  2. Got to agree with Arun…kids of 12 years and above these days know much more than what is needed….

    I think the problem is when one is around 2 to 3 year old kids…they start to talk and are curious and proud to experiment with new words and sentences and that’s trouble for the grown ups…

    One of my German colleagues daughter- two years old- in a party very prouldy stated to everyone that her father has a huge P—-. Everyone was startled for a second and then a naughty one asked “What does ur father have?” and she again repeated it very proudly before her mother closed her mouth tightly. The friend, being a shy guy, was sitting there completely red!

  3. Puranjoy > I don’t know and want to get the hell outta there before I can find out 🙂

    Arun > I know man! If I don’t teach them, Madras auto kaaran will..

    Ela > lol.. I’m going to resort to the old movies ishtyle when I have kids.. Show one moving cycle wheel when they’re toddlers and find that they’ve become 21 in one song..

  4. :)…man, u hve nothing to worry abt…the kids wud pick these words up nowadays from either the tv, book or movies…i wud say its far better they learn it from someone they know 🙂

  5. AC > I’m honored 🙂

    Tys > that’s my logic.. hopefully all parents will see it the way you do!
    Yday, I thought of you, ‘cos there was a car with “kut tys” written at the back 🙂 is that why you’re called tys??

    Mayur > it was a very unparliamentary word da.. I can’t be revealed like this 😛

  6. Tell us what you said!! I am sure those 12-year-olds talk worse. 🙂
    And how did you come to decide that 15 is ok?

  7. solitaire > I’m not sure you understand tamil, and even if you do, I don’t want to repeat it on my blog 🙂 Its the Tamil equivalent of the F word!

    15 is ok cos by that time they’re anyway throwing puberty tantrums they wouldn’t worry about what I say anyway!

  8. Gayathri… pls give me a msg before you drive in Chennai.. I am sure do not want to be the careless motor cyclist who sikki chinna binnamifies in your mouth!

  9. Just discovered your blog…I found this piece extremely apt in the context of what I go through when I board one of our buses here. There’s invariable a crying baby (often eating a banana in the messiest manner possible and discarding the peel in the aisle) in the bus, when there’s no squawking rooster held upside down by its legs, being carried to slaughter. And I often wonder which I’d rather put up with, because I always have to put up with one of them- there’s no choice.

  10. I totally agree. There’s even a certain feeling of helplessness when a two-year-old is suddenly thrust into my hands – the kid takes one look at my face and starts bawling immediately! And then comes the agony of trying several futile attempts to pacify the child… It’s all downhill from there…

    I suppose being good with children takes a lot of practice – it’s easy to forget how we were dealt with as kids.

    Nevertheless, well written! I’ve enjoyed several of your posts… I will keep visiting!

    Cheers,
    Sandeep

    P.S. – Stardust entertains you??!

  11. Pingback: We have been awarded.. « An effort to understand life.. its complexities, niceness and all

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